BrondaBailey’s Weblog

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The return from Bear Lake . . .

Well, the last time I posted (and it has been a while) I described to you our trip to Bear Lake. What I didn’t tell you (although some of you have heard this story in real life since then, I know, but I have a couple more blog updates I want to get up tonight) was what happened upon our return. It was the classical comedy of errors, except no one was around to witness it or laugh at me. Be ye warned all those who read ahead that there be troubling reports of baby poop and puke – anyone who has had a kid should be able to handle it, but don’t come whining to me later about how you thought my story is gross. Of course it’s gross, that’s why it’s funny.

We got home about 8:00 on Saturday night and by the time we got some of the more important things out of the van (Luke’s food, my Nintendo DS, etc.) , we were a little late getting Luke his “pre-bedtime meal which is later than dinner but is his largest helping of mush for the day” meal. Not terribly late, but late. Brenda went off to her aunt’s to pick up our dog Taffy, whom Aunt Sherry had kindly consented to watch while we were “gallivantin’.” In the meantime, I was charged with feeding and bathing Luke and putting him to bed. Nothing too difficult, right? Right . . .

Apparently I had made Luke a little too much of his evening meal. You could blame this on me – that would be uncalled for though. A friend whose baby had never taken a liking to rice cereal had given us some boxes – a different brand than the rice cereal we currently use. The problem enters in here that the rice cereal that we usually use has much smaller flakes, so it’s actually pretty difficult to judge exactly how much of this stuff you have in the bowl. As it turns out though, I probably had too much. Toward the end of Luke’s feeding, he started fussing a little – which usually while feeding him is code for “shovel it in faster.” However, he was strangely avoiding the spoon. What I see now is that Luke had had enough. Eventually he spit up a little and then I finally got the message. It was mostly on his bib though, so no big problem. I unstrapped him, pulled him out, and headed for his room. Luke’s end of day routine is eat mush, bath time, bottle, bed. Just to prove that I am not an incompetent parent, I had already drawn his bath for him while feeding him.

So, we’re headed for his room to get him ready for bed. Just as we were approaching the door, it happened. Spit up. Not minor spit up, puke, enough to cover his front and get all over the floor. Somehow, I managed to maintain my composure long enough to make sure that he puked all over the linoleum rather than on the carpet (kudos to me!) So, I fed Luke too much so he puked, and now he’s covered. I decided that desperate times called for desperate measures – I was going to put him directly in the tub and skip the usual measure pre-bath diaper removal and wipe-down. I dropped his clothes in the sink (trying to keep my now fairly fussy boy from getting more yuck all over him) and congratulated myself on skipping a step until his diaper came off – and I realized that I was going to have to wipe him off, no ifs, ands, or buts.

Yes, dear Luke had pooped. And while I was desperate to get the smell of his former dinner off my hands, I couldn’t bring myself to put him directly in the tub. I walked from the bathroom to his room, succeeded in wiping him off, and even got him grinning. Patting myself on the back, there was a secret danger (or phantom menace if you will) that I hadn’t counted on – baby puke is slippery. That’s right, on my return to the bath, I slipped on the sick. When I say slip, I mean, Three Stooges style, arm flailing wildly (only one because the other was holding on to Luke for dear life) falling like something off a video on YouTube, slip and fall. Luckily, I somehow held on to Luke, who though none worse for the wear, was startled so badly I had to give him a binky in the bathtub. For my efforts, I garned a giant bump on my shin and some big scratches on my arm.

But at least I had got most of the puke off the floor, next time I just don’t want to use myself as the mop.

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September 7, 2008 - Posted by | Family News, Ron's Posts | , , ,

5 Comments »

  1. I’m laughing all the way to the station. Poor Ron and I know you didn’t scare Luke too bad. It reminds me of the time we went to the Drive-In movie when you were 2 in a company car.

    You drank quite a bit of Orange Soda (carbonated of course) and popcorn. When the movie was almost over, you stood up in the back seat and “did a Luke” all over the front seat of the car and myself. Imagine the fun I had listening to Wendy scream and how sticky you were to strap in the car seat to go home. And to make things worse, you fell asleep in the car seat on the way home, and we had to wake you up to clean you up. Never mind clean up the fabric seats in the dark.

    Hmmm…the thought, no good deed ever goes unpunished. You might have to wait about 25 years for Luke to tell you a puke story.

    Love!!!! Resq

    Comment by Resqmom | September 7, 2008 | Reply

  2. It was even better hearing it a second time! Using yourself as a human mop sure made clean up easier though I’m sure.

    Comment by Amber Goddard | September 7, 2008 | Reply

  3. Yuck, that story does sound pretty bad mom. Thankful my spotty childhood memory has wiped that clean from my mind. 🙂

    Comment by brondabailey | September 8, 2008 | Reply

  4. All I can say is….every trip to the Sizzler comes to mind!

    Comment by Britty | September 8, 2008 | Reply

  5. I’d forgotten about the Sizzler. Something about Bailey Boys eating too much and then …………..

    Comment by Resqmom | September 8, 2008 | Reply


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